Wrong Side of the Street
by StarlightSuccubus
Summary: Curiosity killed the cat. And yeah, I was dead. I shouldn't have kissed him, because it felt so... so unlike kissing a woman. Unlike kissing Tanya. An Edward/Bella story. All-Human. Warnings inside.
1. Red Apples or Green Apples?

**Disclaimer: **All copyrighted, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.

Warnings at the end because I don't want to spoil.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Red Apples or Green Apples?**

Every time I looked at her, my heart swelled.

Ever since we were kids I'd felt this strong bond that united us. Something that ran deeper than a mere childhood familiarity. We'd been through everything together.

When my mother ran away.

When her mother passed away.

That was one thing we had in common. We both grew up without a maternal figure, without someone who could guide us through our adolescent disorientation.

We only had each other, and that's how she became my best friend…

My first and only love.

And I only had eyes for her… there was nobody else in my book.

We were made for each other, even if we were defying nature.

Even if we were defying the obnoxious kids from school…

**x-x-x**

_**Edward Cullen**_

_September 2008_

Fuck!

I officially hated the renowned plastic surgeon, Dr. Carlisle Cullen.

And I officially hated this stupid town.

Did this small town even need a plastic surgeon?

Population: 3,100… What. The. Fuck?

Was that a joke? Was he joking?

What was I supposed to do here?

I was going to miss my Shrimp Tempura Roll at Koi.

My credit cards were going to miss their trips to Rodeo Drive.

My dick was going to miss fucking Lauren "fake-tanned-ass" Mallory's mouth.

I was really going to miss L.A.

It was my father's grand idea to move here, to Forks, Washington. He said he was tired of all the superficiality and Botox that Los Angeles provided. He was tired of all the cheating housewives looking to have new tits and asses. He was tired of my womanizing ways, of my getting in trouble, of my mother's fake friends, and of her addiction to Valium.

He said we needed to start again.

To start from scratch…

In a small town where everything was normal and conservative.

Where families didn't go to Scientology church but to an actual Christian church on Sundays.

Where the most expensive department store was not Neiman Marcus, but some local store named after the owner.

Where the flashiest car was not a Ferrari, but my Volvo.

So here I was, at Forks' supermarket with a list in hand, figuring out whether to buy red or green apples.

I sighed, deciding that red apples were less sour. Just as I was closing my hand over the round fruit, another hand grabbed it at the same time. We retracted both our hands immediately and I looked at the person who wanted to steal my apple.

I gasped.

She was fucking hot.

She had shiny brown waist length hair, expressive big doe eyes, a straight lovely nose, and full pink lips. Her face was heart shaped and her body was petite with feminine curves. She looked different, real… so damn beautiful.

I was used to blonde, fake tanned girls with designer clothes, but she looked natural with her pale skin and simple denim outfit. She was perfect.

I must have been staring at her for too long because she cleared her throat and I snapped out of my thoughts. I grabbed the apple and wordlessly offered it to her. She blushed, a wonderful shade of pink coloring her cheeks, and shook her head. Her hair waved and propelled an intoxicating scent my way. Freesias and something else I couldn't name.

"Here, take it," I said, speaking for the first time.

"N-no, thanks," she stuttered shyly, closing her fists at her sides. I chuckled at her wariness and pushed the fruit towards her.

"Take it, you saw it first," I insisted.

"No, really." And she cleared her throat again. "No, I didn't want it anyway."

"Liar," I accused, looking at her deep brown eyes. "You are dying for this apple."

"No, I don't like apples, it was for my friend," she said sincerely. I narrowed my eyes.

"Really? It's seems so red and juicy," I put the apple under my nose and closed my eyes, inhaling its scent. "Deliciously tempting…"

She looked at me as if I was crazy, then she snorted, "That was lame."

"I know," I chuckled and then she laughed, throwing her head back, showing her long neck. I had the strong urge to kiss her neck, but I stopped myself, because we'd just spoken like five words. Besides, I was not in L.A., I was in a supposedly conservative town where people were prude like my saint of a father.

"Well, if you don't want it, I don't either," I put the apple back on its place.

"Don't be ridiculous," she rolled her eyes at me.

"I'm not, it's just that I prefer green apples," I said, walking towards the green fruit. I stopped in my tracks as the beautiful girl spoke with curiosity.

"How come I haven't seen you around?"

"I've just moved here," I threw green apples into a plastic bag. Getting the perfect opportunity to know about the town's activities, I continued, "So…what is it that you people do for fun around here?"

"Not much."

"No parties?" I asked, dreading her answer.

"Well, yeah but they're not _that good_," she was holding unto my cart. "Just a bunch of horny teenagers getting drunk and wanting to have sex."

I snorted, "And that's a problem because…?"

"I hate drunken people, especially immature boys who stare at girls as if they are pieces of meat," she explained. Well, surely these immature kids wanted to do her and she was just annoyed. After all, everyone in their right mind would want to be with this hot girl.

But why was she telling me this? I barely knew her…

"We are hormonal teenagers, that's what we do," I reasoned with her. "Or what did you expect?"

"Someone decent and honest… like you…" she trailed off, blushing again. What was she talking about? She didn't even know me. I was certainly not descent by any means. That's why my father brought me here with him instead of leaving me home alone in California. He said I couldn't be trusted.

"What makes you think I'm decent?" I questioned her, rising one eyebrow.

"Well, for instance you haven't made a move on me."

"Yet," I added quickly. Her mouth opened and her eyes narrowed. She looked cute. I chuckled and added "Just kidding."

Why was I being so nice? Usually I would shamelessly flirt with my prey, then I would invite them to the pool house were we would make out, suck on each other's parts or fuck… you named it. So no, I was not nice. But she looked so innocent and naïve and inexperienced with the opposite sex. _Maybe I could corrupt her…_

Nah, she was too good for me to taint.

"Well, scratch that..." she said indignantly.

"Hey! I'm being decent now," I retorted, looking offended. It was the truth, my puritan father would be proud of me right now. "I even offered you my apple."

"Yeah, I forgot about that…" she grinned sheepishly. "I guess you are indeed a decent little teenage boy."

Was she fucking with me? Did she really want to see I was anything but little?

"There's nothing little in me, honey," I snapped, defending myself. "Want to see?"

She made a gawking sound and added "There goes the decency."

"Well, you should never tell a dude that he's little."

"Well, forgive me, it's not my fault that guys are utterly complicated," she rolled her eyes again. This was turning out to be an odd conversation.

"Well I think it's worldly knowledge that the complicated one is the female gender," I replied, smirking and rolling my eyes, then added "and I'm not going all macho on you, because I adore women, I can't live without them… but you know that what I'm saying _is true_."

"That's bullshit, you…" she started to say but was interrupted by her cell phone ringing."Oh no, it's so late. My father is home and I don't have dinner ready." She looked down at the screen and her eyes widened. "I guess I'll see you around."

She flipped open her cell phone and turned around, walking away from me and giving me a nice view of her perfect round ass.

See? I was _not_ decent.

**x-x-x**

It was Friday before starting classes. I was at my father's office, looking over at résumés to hire a new assistant. His schedule was almost completely booked and he didn't have the time to be the secretary and the doctor, so he asked me to come help him. I had to hire an assistant soon because on Monday I would be starting school. Plus, this job was not for me.

It was ridiculous to see that people in Forks were thrilled to have a plastic surgeon in town. It's like everybody was eager to change who they were. Plus, this was a novelty. Here, people had to go to Seattle for cosmetic surgery, but now that they had L.A.'s best, they even wanted to change the shape of their fucking nails. It was ridiculous.

So my job description for today was to greet and receive patients. It was a boring job, so far there had only been one woman who wanted her tits done, three ugly fourteen year old girls who wanted a nose job and a man who wanted calves' implants. But at eleven thirty, the door opened and a beautiful modelesque strawberry blonde girl entered.

She had a hot body and a gorgeous face. Her eyes were blue and her lips were thin but fleshy. I wanted to nibble on them. She could be on the cover of Maxim.

This town was proving to be rather interesting after all.

She came up to my desk and looked down at me.

"I came to see Dr. Cullen," she said flatly.

"Name?" I asked.

"Tanya Denali."

"Do you have an appointment?" I asked her again, scrolling down the list of appointments, looking for her name.

"Yes, at twelve," she said and indeed, I saw her name at the 12 o'clock spot.

"Okay, the doctor is with a patient right now, so you'll have to wait," I pointed to the sofa. "You go sit down there."

She turned around and I looked at her ass. Why was it that girls in this town have nice asses? The girl from the market also had a pretty little ass.

God, the girl from the food mart… why had I been so stupid? I didn't even ask for her name. I wanted to see her again. Well, eventually I was going to, this town was so small. Maybe at school…

"I heard that Dr. Cullen is the best, it is true?" asked Tanya, flipping through a magazine.

"Yeah, he does really nice tits," I said automatically. I saw the girl's reaction and laughed out loud. Tanya was looking revolted.

"Sorry, my brain filter is not working properly," I said apologetically, because I'd been caught daydreaming about a girl whose name I didn't even know yet. "And yes, he's a very good surgeon; only three people have died at his table."

Again, that shocked expression appeared on her face.

"That's not funny, you…you're not funny," she accused angrily. I snorted.

"I know, I'm losing my touch, it must be the weather here in Forks," I reasoned with myself, realizing that it was true; I really was indeed losing myself here.

"Oh, you are the new kid, right?" she asked, the previous topic forgotten.

"Yes, I'm Edward Cullen."

"Oh, Dr. Cullen's son," she stated. "I'm Tanya, but you already knew that."

"Yeah."

There was an awkward silence.

"So… Tanya, what are you doing this weekend?" I've been in my house all week and it was driving me crazy. My daily routine consisted on watching movies, wanking, and having phone sex with Lauren Mallory.

"Hmm…" she looked lost in thought.

"That boring, huh?" I cursed the day my father decided to move here.

"Yes, well… there's this small party tomorrow." My eyes brightened, as small as this event was, a party was still a party and I was dying to get drunk.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yes, it's at some dude's house, but I'm not going." I couldn't help but catch the saddened tone of her voice.

"Why is that?" I asked curiously. She turned to look at me with a forced smile.

"Well, I was hoping I could schedule my surgery for tomorrow?" she enquired hopefully.

"What do you want to get done?"

"My nose, I want it to be straighter… I have a small bump," Tanya said, showing me her profile. I couldn't see the "bump". This girl was a perfect ten, she didn't need stupid surgery, but I didn't voice that out loud.

"Well let me see if my father is free at some point tomorrow," I was scrolling through the appointments for the next day. "Yep, there's one free spot at seven in the morning."

She squealed.

"But first you have to listen to what he has to say," I warned her, "He might not want to operate on you tomorrow; they have to run blood tests and such…"

"Well, cross your fingers for me."

Then her phone went off. She flipped it open, putting it on her ear.

"Bella?" she answered. I turned to look at the computer. "I'm at Dr. Cullen's office." I could hear her saying.

"Well, I told you, I want to get a nose job," I rolled my eyes. People were delusional. They spoke about surgery as if it was a haircut.

"Because I knew you wouldn't approve," she said in a low voice, "You were going to convince me not to get it."

I rolled my eyes. Her friend or with whomever she was talking to was right. She didn't need this. My father was going to tell her anyways.

"Of course I need it!" She whined. "Bella, don't be mad."

There was a moment of silence.

"Yes, I know… me too, bye," she said curtly and hung up.

**x-x-x**

It was Saturday and I was bored out of my mind.

School started on Monday so I didn't know anybody here. Usually, I made friends easily but so far I've only talked to two people that looked my age; to this Tanya chick and to the other hot brunette. I was disappointed because I was losing my ability to capture girls' attentions. Back at home, girls threw themselves at me on a daily basis but this two didn't even check me out.

The brunette "kind of" flirted with me. Well, no, I tried to flirt with her, but to no avail.

Fuck, fuck, fuck… I hated this town.

What could I do? I could always watch Pulp Fiction for the millionth time…

"Nah" I said out loud. Making up my mind, I grabbed my car keys and got out of my house. I was driving around town, looking for something to do when I remembered. There was that party, but this Tanya girl wouldn't even be there and I didn't know anybody. Apparently she "had" a deviated septum that needed to be corrected, so my dad had scheduled her surgery for today.

Well, maybe the hot brunette was going to be there.

I stopped at a liquor store and bought a bottle of JD with my fake I.D. I started looking for the party and sure enough, this being a small town, it was an easy task. I saw a row of cars parked in front of a big house. I parked my car up front and got outside. I opened the door to the house and entered. I looked around and saw that people were already drunk. What was wrong with these people? It was 10 o'clock. Maybe this had started early.

I made my way around the room, opening my bottle of Jack and taking a swig. I knew I was going to pay in the morning for drinking from the bottle but this was what I needed tonight.

Some people were staring at me and some others were too drunk to notice the new kid. I didn't care; I just wanted to get wasted somewhere outside my house. I saw an empty couch and plopped down. Immediately I was greeted by a skinny brunette girl.

"Hi, you must be Dr. Cullen's son," she slurred. She was swaying and then before I could get a hold of her, she collapsed on top of me. Fuck, this is not how they threw themselves at me back at home. She giggled annoyingly and I rolled my eyes. I helped her extricate herself from my body and she sat down next to me.

"Sorry."

Well, at least the bitch had good manners.

"It's okay, and yes I'm Edward Cullen," I said politely. "You are?"

"Jessica Stanley."

Half a bottle of JD later, this Jessica chick wouldn't stop talking and touching my leg. I concentrated on the alcohol in my system and tuned her out. I looked around and saw a big bulky guy groping some hot girl's ass. I could tell that he was a jock and she was his cheerleader girlfriend. Jessica had told me that his name was Emmett McCarthy and he was the host of this party. His parents had gone to Seattle for the weekend so he had the house to himself.

"And he had the nerve to break up with me and then she-"

Tired of listening to Jessica and wanting to go to the bathroom, I interrupted her.

"Jessica, I need to pee," I was looking around for the bathroom.

"Oh," she giggled, throwing her arms around my neck. I had to suppress a groan. I hated to deal with drunken clingy girls.

"Jessica, I really need to go," I pushed her away from me. "Where is it?"

"Where is what?" she asked dumbly.

"The bathroom," I snapped.

"Oh, kinky boy, you want to take me upstairs, don't you?" she asked suggestively. I sighed.

"No Jessica, I really need to pee," I said harshly.

"Oh," she was disappointed. "There's one next to the entrance door and there's one upstairs."

"Thanks," I opted to go to the upstairs bathroom because I could see people waiting outside the entrance of the closest one. I climbed the stairs two at a time. Once I was on the second floor, I saw a door at my right and entered. I turned on the light and I was relieved to see that it was the bathroom. I didn't want to interrupt somebody's business. I went to the toilet, set my bottle on the floor, and put the seat up. I unzipped myself and moaned in relief as I started spilling all my bladder's contents.

When I was done I heard a snort. I zipped myself quickly and looked around. There was nobody here except me. Am I that drunk? Unless…

I dragged the shower curtains open and was greeted by a pleasant surprise. The beautiful girl that I couldn't get out of my mind was lying in the tub. I looked at her hand and she was clutching a vodka bottle wrapped in a paper brown bag.

"You?" She asked giggling. I smiled despite the awkward situation.

"What are you doing here?" I sat on the bathtub's edge.

"Hands!" she barked.

"Huh?" I asked stupidly.

"Wash your hands," she indicated. I chuckled and went to the sink to wash my hands. I dried them with a towel and sat down again.

"Now, tell me what are you doing all alone?" She looked like she'd been drinking for quite some time now. Her hair was sprawled all over her face and neck, her shirt had ridden up, showing off a portion of her flat belly, her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were heavy lidded.

She was too beautiful that it hurt my fucking eyes just by looking at her.

"I'm drinking." She motioned towards the bottle in her hand.

"Yeah, I can see that," I outstretched my hand and grabbed my own bottle. I knew I shouldn't be drinking anymore. How was I going to get to my house? Carlisle would kill me. "But what I meant is… why are you drinking here all by yourself?

She shrugged.

"Do you get off by spying on people taking a leak?" I asked teasingly. She smacked my arm. "Ouch!"

"You deserved that." She closed her eyes and took a swig from her bottle.

"Hey! I should be the one offended. You listened to me while I was…" I reasoned.

"Oh, that… yeah I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. Then something occurred to me.

"You never told me your name…" I was waiting for her answer.

"Bella"

"It suits you, Bella means-" I was cut off.

"Beautiful in Italian," she snapped, sounding annoyed for some reason. What was her problem?

There was an awkward silence. I took a big swig from my bottle. The only sounds that could be heard were the blazing hip hop songs and the liquid of our bottles. My eyes were focused on the floor, hers on the wall in front of the tub.

"What's yours?" Bella asked cutting the silence. I turned to look at her and she didn't look wound up anymore.

"Excuse me?" I asked stupidly.

"Your name, what is it?" she articulated every word.

"Edward."

My ass was starting to get numb from sitting on the edge of the tub. I took another sip of JD and tried to relax. I felt awkward and nervous, being like this with Bella. Maybe it was the alcohol fogging my brain. I should stop drinking. I didn't know what to say to her, and this never happened to me before. I had good humor and could hold an interesting conversation, but with Bella everything I said she took it the wrong way. She was confusing.

But so fucking hot.

"Fuck, I shouldn't be drinking," I voiced my thoughts.

"Why is that?" I turned to look at her and I had the strong urge to run my hands through her hair and tuck it behind her ear. I contained myself.

"Because I drove here," I explained. Taking a deep breath I continued, "My dad would kill me if anything bad happens. Back home I would pay someone to drive my car for me when I went out, but that privilege ended the moment I set foot in this fucking town."

"Oh, don't worry… nothing bad happens in this _fucking_ town," she emphasized the word "fucking". I grinned at her and she showed me a beautiful smile. My heart skipped a beat. Fuck, she really was beautiful and I needed to stop drinking, "Besides, my dad is the chief of police."

"Oh, should I be scared?"

"No, he's the kindest person I've ever known," she smiled at the memory of her father.

"Is he going to take out his gun if I decide to ask you out?" I asked flirtatiously. I grinned at her, expecting one in returned but I was taken aback when her expression turned to one of disdain. Her reaction made me feel like shit. I was walking on egg shells with her. Did I say something wrong? And why was it affecting me so much? I barely knew her. It's not like I wanted her to be my girlfriend, right?

I've never wanted someone to be my girlfriend.

I've never had a girlfriend.

But I wanted Bella badly… in any form, shape or size…

I wanted her for some reason.

But she was turned off by my sole presence. This never happened to me and yes, I was an arrogant motherfucker, but it was the truth. My buddy Seth was always jealous of me because I could get any girl I wanted.

Bella took a big gulp from her bottle and her brow furrowed. She seemed to be contemplating about something that was confusing her. Making up my mind, I decided to cut the crap once and for all.

"Bella, do you want me to leave?" I asked, and if she said yes, I was never talking to her again.

"No, no it's okay… stay," she looked at me. I was taken aback by the deep emotions that were showing in her eyes.

Sadness and confusion.

I wanted to stoke her cheek, to take away all the sadness that she was feeling, but I didn't. I couldn't because I didn't know how to act or what to say in front of her. So I abstained myself. It was not the end of the world. And maybe tomorrow I wouldn't feel this strong need to be with her.

Maybe it was the alcohol acting.

The alcohol in me, making me crave this kind of affection.

Yes, it was definitely the alcohol.

Or maybe I wanted her because I couldn't have her?

Yes, that was it.

But then I looked into her eyes again.

Fuck, the look in her eyes.

It was as if she was pleading me with her gaze to help her. To take away the sadness and to sort out her confusion…

_Move bitch get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way._

_Move bitch get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way._

Bella groaned, I sighed, and our moment was gone. Thanks Luda…

"I hate hip hop and rap music," said Bella through gritted teeth. I suppressed a snort.

"Why is that?" I asked curiously.

"Well, it's becau—"

"Wait… scoot over, my butt is killing me," I cut her off, my butt was completely numb.

I was trying to get into the tub with her. I stood up and stretched myself, my shirt riding up a bit. I saw Bella's eyes fixed on my abs, but she quickly averted her gaze. She was blushing.

"What?" she asked abruptly.

"Move over, I want to get into that tub, my butt feels numb, the edge was digging into me," I explained. I was a jerk, I knew my way with women, but this one was bravery in liquid form.

Was she going to kick my ass?

What could I say? She looked cozy in there.

"There's no room here," she frowned. "Plus, there's plenty of room in the floor."

"Yeah, but you look pretty comfy in there, and the floor is cold and hard," I whined, giving her my puppy eyes and along with a pouty lip. She hesitated for a moment, but then moved and made room for me.

Edward: 1.

_Finally._

Grinning, I climbed over to the other side and lay on my back. Bella was lying on her side, giving me her back, squeezed between the tub's wall and my body. I felt tingles on my right side, the side that was pressed against her warm body.

But as pleasant as it felt, I tried to make room for her. I pressed my body to the other side of the bathtub and grabbed Bella's shoulders, dragging her so she was half lying on top of my body. She looked at me timidly and a blush crept over her face and neck. I grinned at her and sighed.

Big mistake.

Because when I inhaled, I was attacked by her inebriating scent. It smelled exactly like I remembered. Freesias and that something else, but now it was combined with alcohol.

I was intoxicated. But in a good way_… in a dangerous way._

And half her body was on top of mine.

Fuck! And she wasn't kicking me in the balls.

I cleared my throat.

"Where were we?" I asked, immediately remembering as I listened to the song, "Ah! Why don't you like hip hop music?"

"It's degrading," she scrunched her nose. I couldn't help but noticed that she looked really cute. I chuckled.

"Degrading?" I asked, raising one eyebrow in question.

"Yes, the men always refer to women as_pussy_ or _bitches_and all they want to do is to _fuck 'em_ and to me, that's degrading," she explained and I had to suppress a groan when she said the dirty words. I couldn't help it, I was a hormonal teenager. "And what's more undignified is the women that appear on the videos."

"Why? I think they are hot," I said and regretted it because she surely would kick my ass this time. I was relieved when she only rolled her eyes at me.

"Yes, they are… good looking, but they are barely covered," as she said this, she turned her face away from me.

"Well, that's the whole point, isn't it?" I questioned and then continued cynically. "If these women bust their asses in the gym and only eat tuna fish, why not show off the result of an enormous sacrifice?"

"Yes, I see your point." To my surprise she agreed, "but they can do it in a more dignified way."

"For example?"

"Girls in beauty pageants," she was looking at me. "They wear swim suits and they look pretty and classy."

"Yeah, but that's because beauty pageants are for girls, they are modeling for themselves," I retorted. "But I also see your point, I wouldn't want to see the mother of my children wearing a poor excuse of a dress and showing off her butt in national television, that's a bad example."

"Yes, and that's why I hate most of the hip hop songs," Bella said with an air of finality.

We remained silent for a couple of minutes, but it wasn't awkward. I took that moment to look at her. I hadn't noticed that her posture was a bit stiff and that her hand was twitching on top of her stomach. She was taking deep breaths and avoided looking at me.

My hand instinctively reached out for hers. She became stiffer and I could feel that her palm was sweaty. She was nervous. I made her nervous. She turned to look at me and I gave her my heart melting crooked smile. Her eyes darkened and her lips parted slightly. She looked breathtaking, but as quickly as that expression of lust crossed her face, it disappeared.

But it made me feel better, because at least I knew she was melting down. She was crumbling.

"Why are you nervous?" I asked chuckling. She looked at me embarrassedly and said, "Because I've never been this close to a boy," she admitted and I felt a sense of pride swelling in my chest.

"You've never had a boyfriend?" I was curious, already knowing the answer. She shook her head and blushed. And that feeling swelled my chest tenfold because she was not tainted, she was pure and innocent and beautiful and I had this strong desire to make her mine. Not just in the physical sense, but in every sense.

I would finally settle down.

I would finally bring a girl home and Esme would be so happy, she would forget all about her pills.

I would do anything for this girl. And it was not the alcohol talking because since the moment I saw her at the market, I knew that this girl belonged with me. Just now I was having this epiphany… this realization…

Why hadn't she had a boyfriend? Not that I was complaining, but the dudes here in this stupid town were blind—_she was so fucking beautiful._ How could they have overlooked this gorgeous specimen? I had to ask.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Bella asked, turning her face towards mine. As she saw that our faces were only centimeters apart, her expression of lust returned.

"Why is it that you haven't had a boyfriend? You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," I whispered, mesmerized by her deep brown eyes. Her hot breath was fanning over my face. My heart was beating wildly.

She dismissed my question. However, I was confused and eager by the implications of her next statement.

"I haven't even kissed a boy."

Bella looked intensely at my eyes, and then her gaze traveled to my mouth, her tongue wetting her pink lips.

"Really?" I gasped. She remained silent, a thoughtful expression overshadowing her lust. For a second I became anxious, but then she bit her lower lip and a groaned escaped me. The sound seemed to spur her on, because her next question was my undoing.

"Can I kiss you?"

How could I deny such a request?

I nodded, never breaking eye contact with her. Bella shifted so she was lying on her side, I did the same. As we were facing each other, I cupped her face with my hand, my thumb stroking her cheek. She closed her eyes for a second and her lips parted. She looked deliciously stunning. Her eyes opened and I noticed they were darker. She started leaning towards me, I did the same.

When my lips met hers, my whole world turned upside down. I never thought that a simple contact would make me have this reaction. The kiss was slow, and we were savoring each other's lips. It was the best feeling in the world. I've kissed many girls in my short life, but I've never felt like this. To me, a kiss was nothing, but this one meant everything.

Her hand was on my shoulder, but soon it traveled to my neck, to my cheek, and finally it stopped at my hair. Her fingers threaded through it, massaging my scalp. I groaned as she started nibbling on my lower lip. All of these sensations were sobering me up and I was glad because I was aware of everything that was happening between Bella and me.

I wanted more. My hand that was resting on her cheek traveled to her waist, pulling her closer to me. Bella moaned as our lower halves came into contact. She threw her leg over my hip and I grunted. Every inch of her body was pressed up against mine. She was into this moment, just as much as I was. I traced her lips with my tongue, asking for permission to enter her hot cavern. She granted it as she opened her mouth and our tongues met, dancing with one another.

Her grip on my hair tightened and I was beyond turned on by her boldness. The shy inexperienced girl was long forgotten. Bella looked like she knew what she was doing to me. She kissed really well and her body was molding into mine, which had me already painfully hard.

My fingers found the hem of her shirt and I contemplated whether or not to slip her shirt off, whether she'd let me or not. But I was surprised as her free hand imitated mine and she started lifting my shirt, her hand tracing the muscles in my abdomen. She went higher, resting her palm on my chest and brushing my skin there. I forgot about her shirt because I was too busy enjoying her caresses. My hips started to move on their own accord too, looking for friction. At feeling my hardness against her, she broke the kiss and gasped. I turned to look at her face and her eyes were wide in surprise and her cheeks flushed.

"That is for you, because of you," I whispered huskily into her ear. I nibbled on her earlobe, my cheek rubbing against her and I wondered whether my stubble would be uncomfortable for her but at the sensation, she moaned my name. I smirked in triumph as her hips started moving in tune with mine. The friction felt amazing.

As I sucked more of her ear, she started nuzzling against my face. It was odd that Bella was doing this, but I didn't care because the sounds that she was emitting were driving me wild with desire. My hand wondered from her waist to the side of her breast, my thumb tentatively brushing against her.

Bella continued to rub her face against mine but she moved her hand, placing it in my hip as her leg tightened around me, her sneaker digging against my butt. I grunted low in my chest. Bella tilted her face so she was looking at me, a sexy smirk present in her features. I gulped, causing her gaze to travel to my neck. She licked her swollen lips, my dick twitching slightly.

Suddenly, Bella flipped us over so I was lying on my back, her on top of me. She leaned over my neck and placed small kisses against it, stopping at my Adam's apple. The beautiful girl started sucking and licking, all the while feeling my scratchy chin. I was glad I didn't shave in the morning because she seemed to like my five-o-clock shadow. I gripped her hips and grinded against her small frame. Bella started to rotate her clothed pussy against me, looking for the delicious friction it created. Fuck, I was going to explode.

I was so caught up in the moment that when I felt her hand on my hard on, I snapped my eyes open. Oh, fucking God, she had me at her mercy. Bella was tracing the outline of my clothed cock, as if trying to make out the shape and memorizing it, earning a moan from me.

What was turning me on even more, were not only the sensations she was creating on my body, but the boldness of her actions. The transformation from the shy innocent girl to this sexy wanton woman. She was losing control because of me.

Her hand started with an explorative stroke but soon her caresses were anything but tender. She gave me a firm squeeze over my jeans and caused my body to jerk. I was so lost and into the moment, that when I heard something crashed against the floor, I groaned. It wasn't a sound from the desire I was feeling, but from realization.

Fucking vodka.

I forgot that her bottle had been placed at the edge of the tub, so when I jerked, it smashed into the bottom of the tub. Luckily, the glass had not been broken, but the liquid started pouring out, soaking my leg.

Bella stopped her actions and looked to see what had caused the commotion. When she saw her bottle rolling around the tub and over my damp leg she started drunkenly giggling.

"I guess it's time to take you out of those wet jeans," Bella said seductively, her smirk full of implications. I had to suppress a groan. Fuck, I knew she was drunk and I had been drunk too, but now that I was sobering up I knew better. I had become one of those drunken kids that she hated so much. I was taking advantage of her for my own pleasure. In other circumstances I would not have cared, but I cared about her a lot to trespass my rights. It had been her first fucking kiss for Christ's sake!

I was a jerk…

I was an asshole…

She was going to hate me in the morning.

I snapped out of my thoughts as I felt her little hands fumbling with the buckle of my belt. With the mighty will power that God was giving me at that moment, I stopped her actions.

"No, Bells, I- I'm sorry… we, we can't do this right now," I explained and tried my best to be convincing, because what I wanted more than anything was to take both our clothes off and fuck her senseless. I was so fucking hard and it hurt. I wanted, no, _needed release_. She must have seen the pained expression on my face because she frowned at me.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked worriedly.

"Oh, God, no… I'm so painfu—I think I'm going to… it's just that we drank a lot and if we take this further, I think we'll regret it in the morning." I tried to explain as best as I could without hurting her feelings. Along the road I had learned that if one stopped a girl from having her way with you, she felt rejected. But Bella had not been rejected, I wanted her badly, Eddie down there wanted her also.

Painfully confused, Bella said, "I did something wrong, didn't I?"

I chuckled at her absurd comment, cupping her face as my thumbs stroke her cheeks.

"Bella, believe me, you were… _are_ amazing, I was so turned on just by kissing you," I said shyly, smiling at her. She giggled and collapsed on top of me. I held her close and she nuzzled against my neck and chin. "I didn't know that just kissing could feel like that, but wow!"

"Really?" she asked, tilting her head to look me straight in the eye.

"Yes," I nodded.

"Me neither," she snuggled her face against my cheek. She really seemed to like it there.

"Don't do that, I didn't shave this morning." I said, bringing up the topic about her obsession with my stubble. I felt her smile against my skin.

"Good, because I like it, it feels different, masculine, rough, and sexy… It's a nice change," she explained but I didn't pay attention to the last part because she had called me sexy. My hard cock twitched again. Fuck.

We didn't speak more. The only uncomfortable thing about this whole situation was the lack of space in my pants. But I dismissed it because the girl of my dreams had fallen asleep peacefully on top of me. What I was doing was really out of character for me, but I wanted to enjoy it for once in my fucking lifetime. We just held onto each other and I was lost in her smell, her silky hair, her light warm weight, and her even heart beat. I closed my eyes and fell asleep, a smile adorning my face.

This town was not as bad as it seemed.

**x-x-x**

Sometime, around 6 a.m. on Sunday, I woke up in the tub, alone.

I craned my neck to look for Bella, but I winced as pain shot through me. Why did I have to sleep in this uncomfortable bathtub? It looked cozy while Bella had been here, but now it was not. I stood up and realized that I felt like shit. I needed to get home; my father was going to be wondering where I had been.

I drove to my house, meanwhile feeling like shit. I knew it was a bad idea drinking alcohol from the bottle, but I didn't regret one bit from last night. Bella had been amazing; she was everything I've ever dreamed about and more. I couldn't wait to see her again. I didn't ask for her phone, but I was sure I was going to see her tomorrow at school.

After all I didn't want to look desperate. She needed her own space and if I called her today, she would probably freak out. Then again, if I didn't call her, she would think I wasn't interested and would never speak to me. I was fucking overanalyzing everything like a girl.

I wasn't going to, I didn't know her phone number… _but I could always get it._

Damn, I didn't know what to do.

In the end I opted to see her tomorrow at school. Because if I saw Bella today, I would throw myself at her, but the difference would be that we wouldn't be drinking. I knew she had been brave and confident about last night because of the little help of our friend Absolut.

I stayed all day in bed, watching movies and sleeping. My father was mad because I didn't call last night. What a hypocrite. Back in L.A. I'd never called and he didn't even notice my absence because he was never home. I guess that was part of the new regime.

At 6:30 that evening, I couldn't wait to see Bella until tomorrow so I decided that I should give her a call. She looked like the type of girl who would expect a call from the guy she had made out with. Plus, it was her first kiss; for a girl that was a big deal, so if I didn't call she would be disappointed and angry at me.

I remembered that last night she told me that her father was the chief of police. I called the police station and told them I was Dr. Cullen and that I needed to talk to Bella. People from towns were naive, so they gave me her phone number.

So fucking easy.

I dialed the number.

Waited.

I was fucking nervous. Fuck.

"Hello?" I recognized her immediately.

"Bella?" I asked just to make sure it was her.

"Yeah, she's talking, who is this?" I could tell that her voice sounded a bit off, like she had been crying.

"It's Edward, remember me?" I was trying to ease the sadness from her voice.

"Oh," was her response and I couldn't help but notice the disappointment in her voice. Had she been expecting someone else's call?

"Were you expecting someone else?" I voiced curiously. I knew she wouldn't tell me, but I had to ask.

"No," she lied curtly.

There was an awkward silence.

"So, Bella, about yesterday…" I started but I didn't know what I was going to say, because I hadn't thought about it. I just wanted to see what she was doing and maybe invite her to some place.

"Look, Edward just forget it, okay?" I was taken aback. I thought she liked me. I was sure we connected, that we were attracted to each other. I could've bet on my Volvo that she was into me. I guess I was wrong.

"What?" Now I knew how all the girls felt when I rejected them. "Are you okay?"

"Edward, what happened yesterday was a mistake, I was too drunk to know what I was doing." Her voice was cracking. Now I knew for sure that she was crying. What did I do wrong?

"Bella, I don't understand. What's wrong?" I questioned.

"I'm sorry I threw myself at you, I'm glad you stopped us." Something clicked inside me and I knew what was wrong.

"Bella, is that why you are crying?" I asked, wanting to know her reasons for turning me down. "Is it because I would think you are easy? Because I don't think you are… you are so innocent and perfect. In fact, I'm an asshole for taking advantage of you that way, and what happened yesterday was not a mistake, because nothing happened that we could have regretted."

It had to be that, after all, I knew Bella hadn't done this, she told me she's never been kissed. Maybe she was hung over and the feeling of dread was taking over her. I knew that feeling, it had happened to me that time when I had sex with Leah Clearwater after Seth (which was her brother and my best mate from L.A.) warned me to stay away from her.

"No, Edward, that's the problem, you don't know me, you think I'm someone I'm not, but I guess you'll find out eventually." Her voice saddened me. She made me behave like a pussy. I was not like this; I was a heartless son of a bitch. I didn't care about other's feelings except mine. My mother was right; someday I would find a girl that would put me in my place. I guess Bella was that girl.

"What's that?" I asked curiously again.

"I have to go Edward, my father's waiting for dinner an—" I cut her off. What was she talking about?

"Bella, what's going on?" I asked concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, but I really have to go now. Look, you are a nice guy, I'm glad I met you and after you go to school tomorrow I hope we can still be friends," she said cryptically. What did school had anything to do with this? I was puzzled.

"Bella, I'm not a nice guy, believe me when I tell you I'm a pig," I chuckled sarcastically, I was being honest. "I hardly respect women, I take advantage of drunk girls for my own pleasure and that's how I am, I know you hate my type, bu—"

Now she cut me off. "Deep down you are a nice guy Edward, I know," she said with finality. "I have to go, but I guess I'll see you tomorrow and then you can judge me… we'll see if you still want to be my friend."

And she hung up.

I stayed all night thinking about our conversation. What did I have to judge for myself? Why was she so reluctant to talk to me? Was I scaring her off with my intensity? I knew I was being intense, but I couldn't help it. I had never been rejected in my whole life and I hadn't felt like this either. I finally slept at two in the morning.

Later that day, I woke up at 5 a.m. School started at seven so I had two hours until then. I took a long shower, picked a pair of dark jeans and my favorite t-shirt and got dressed. I made my way to the kitchen and saw that my mom had cooked me pancakes. I guess she was high on Valium again.

I ate and at 6:24, I was in my car, driving towards Forks High. When I arrived, I parked in an empty space, next to a rusted old red truck. Looking up to see who the owner was, I was startled when I saw Bella on the driver's seat. I gathered my notebook and a pen and stepped out of the car. Bella did the same and looked at me.

I took in her appearance and gasped. She looked paler than the two times I've seen her. Her eyes were puffy and she had dark circles under them. Her hair was a mess, she looked like shit. Beautiful shit, but still shit.

I didn't go after her because I knew from last night's call that she didn't want to talk to me anymore. Not until I "judged her" for myself. What the fuck was that? What was that supposed to mean?

As she was walking, to what I assumed was her classroom, a blonde guy passed her by and pushed her aside with his shoulder. I clenched my fists and made my way towards Bella and that asshole. When I was near them I could hear what he was saying.

_Cough, "_Dyke,_" cough._

Enraged, I grabbed the guy by the collar of his shirt and threatened him.

"You fucking piece of shit, if I ever see you touching Bella with your filthy body ever again, I'll kill you. Do you understand?" I used my more menacing voice. He nodded, looking frightened. I pushed him away and looked at Bella. Her eyes widened, looking scared. I could see that a small group of students was gathering around us, but I didn't care. I was used to the attention.

"Bella, sorry it's just this guy pushed you and called you a—" I explained but was cut off once more by Bella.

"Edward, mind your own business," I nodded in understanding. I heard a couple of "Ooo's", but dismissed those motherfuckers. I had more important issues and one was the new mental note: I was scaring her off with my new found intensity. I didn't know anything about chasing a girl, I needed to talk to Lauren and Seth and ask them all about it. I hoped the bitch wouldn't get jealous. _Now I knew for sure_ _how girls felt when I ignored them the next day after fooling around with them._

"I'm sorry Bella, next time I won't bother," I snapped because even though I got her meaning, I had dignity after all.

"Well, yes, next time mind your own business. I'm used to this shit. Mike Newton always does that, so why would it be any different with you here?" Bella was angry, but I could see that her question was not only meant for me, but she had an internal struggle going on inside her pretty little head.

"It won't but I think he deserved it, he—" and once again I was cut off, not by Bella, but by none other than Tanya Denali.

"Bella, what's happening here?"

She looked stunning, just like the first time I saw her. The only difference was that she had a piece of gauze on her face. Bella looked at her nose and frowned.

"Tanya," I said nodding, acknowledging her presence.

"Edward," she did the same. Bella looked between us, confusion written on her face.

"You two know each other?" she asked timidly, pointing at us with her index finger.

"Well, yeah, my father did her nose."

"Yeah, he did," said Tanya. Something about her voice was odd.

"Oh," was all that Bella said as Tanya grabbed her by the elbow and dragged her to the direction of her classroom. Sighing, I started at their retreating forms. As I was making my way to the office to pick up my schedule, a hand clapped me on the back.

"They are pretty hot, aren't they?"

I turned to look at the owner of the hand and saw that it was Emmett McCarty, the host of Saturday's party.

"Yeah, they are."

"Such a shame," said Emmett to himself, looking at the girls as well. He snapped out of it and turned to look at me. "What's your name, new kid?"

"Edward, you're Emmett right?" I asked.

"Yeah, how did you know?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I went to your party on Saturday and a girl named Jessica told me it was your house," I explained.

"Oh! Yeah I think I saw you, but I was too drunk to remember," Emmett leaned over me and whispered, "Listen, you better watch out for Jessica, that chick is bad news."

"You didn't need to tell me, believe me. I realized that on my own, lucky for me I was too drunk as well."

And just like that, Emmett and I became friends. He helped me find the office and to fill out the forms and schedule. I didn't have classes with Emmett because he was a senior and I was a junior. I had Spanish class with Jessica, who I avoided completely. I had Calculus class with a girl named Alice Brandon, she seemed pretty nice. I could see her as my first potential girl friend (_not_ _girlfriend_), which back home that was impossible for me to have. Next was lunch and after that I had Biology. People seemed to be whispering about the morning incident with this Newton kid.

When the bell rang, I gathered my things (my notebook, pen and the class syllabus) and made my way outside the room. Alice was walking beside me.

"You should sit with us at lunch," she was bouncing excitedly on her heels. I chuckled.

"Actually, a guy named Emmett told me to join him, he'll be waiting for me," I apologetically declined her invitation.

"Oh, that's awesome. Good thing I always sit with him," she winked at me.

As we reached the door, I could see Emmett waiting for me.

"I see you've already met Alice."

"Yeah."

We walked to the cafeteria, talking excitedly. The bitter memory of Bella's encounter was thrown at the back of my head.

_But not for long._

"Edward, you didn't do anything with Jessica, did you?" asked Emmett, waiting for my response. I snorted and said, "No fucking way, I couldn't stand her for more than three minutes. Thanks to my inebriated state, I was able to tune her out most of the time," I explained, earning laughter from my new friends.

"So, where were you, we didn't see you?" Alice asked and turned to look at Emmett. "Did you see him?"

He shrugged, looking at me expectantly.

"Well, I was upstairs with some other girl, but I don't remember her name." For some reason I didn't want to tell them that I had been with Bella. Despite of our argument, I wanted to keep our rendezvous our little secret.

We arrived at the cafeteria. There was a table at the far corner of the room where two blondes were waiting for their friends. One was a boy and the other one was the cheerleader I saw Emmett with.

"Rose, Jazz, this is Edward Cullen," Alice introduced, "Edward, these are the Hale twins."

"Jasper is Alice's boyfriend and Rosalie is mine, so watch out," said Emmett, and I grinned.

I bought a pizza slice and an orange juice for lunch. As I returned to the table, I saw that at the one next to ours, Bella was sitting with Tanya. She had her arm wrapped around Bella's shoulder, it looked weird.

"Urgh, disgusting," said Rosalie Hale from behind me. I turned to look at her, and she was looking at the same spot I've been staring at.

"I think they are hot, wouldn't you agree Jazz?" asked Emmett, looking at Bella's table also. Rosalie rolled her eyes at him. I was confused.

"Yeah man, they are every guys' wet dream," Jasper said dreamily. Alice smacked him in the arm. "Ouch!"

"Why is that?" I asked curiosity evident in my voice.

Everybody leaned towards the center of the table, and then Emmett whispered, "You see those chicks over there? The ones you were staring at in the morning?"

I nodded and waved my hand for him to continue.

"Well, they are, you know…" he trailed off. I was more confused by the minute.

"They are what?" I was anxiously waiting for the answer.

"They are together," whispered Rosalie.

"_What the fuck?"_My eyes widened.

"They are the _dykiest_ chicks in the whole planet," said Emmett. That's what she meant. She was unavailable…

"No, it can't be…" I gasped. But, it could be, it made perfect sense. No innocent girl could kiss like that. No innocent girl would throw herself at me that way. She was feisty and sexy and so good.

It made perfect sense.

All the things that she told me.

How she hated drunken horny boys, how she thought the male gender was confusing, how she hated the woman degradation in hip hop videos, how she never been close to a boy, how she never had a _boyfriend, _ and how she never kissed boy.

She had kissed, but not a boy.

Fucking shit!

"Edward, what's wrong? You look pale," stated Alice.

I cleared my throat.

"Nothing…"

There was an awkward silence, everybody was staring at me.

"Don't they have lesbian chicks back in Los Angeles?" asked Emmett.

"Of course, it's just that…" I trailed off.

"Yeah, I know what you mean, they are hot, hot, hot!" said Jasper teasingly. Alice smacked him again.

"Yeah, Mike Newton's been trying to get together with them but I guess they only like pussy," said Emmett, and how wrong he was. Or maybe I was… maybe Bella didn't like me as a man and that's why she didn't want to speak to me.

"How long have they been together?" I asked, because I had to know. Maybe they just started hanging out.

"Ooohh! Like forever!" said Alice. "They have been inseparable ever since we were kids, I was their friend once, we were the three of us always, but when they started, like you know… I was interested in boys and I guess I started hanging out with Rose and Jazz and, well, that's that."

Oh, fuck, this is why I never go out with girls. You give them either all the love or all the money and they screw you.

Under other circumstances I would have been a pig like this Newton character and would have tried to have a threesome with them, but right now the only thing I was capable of thinking was that I was jealous.

Jealous of a Maxim model look alike.

I was jealous of a girl.

I would never look like a Maxim model, even if my dad did his magic.

This was confusing the shit out of me.

Why did these things happen to me?

I guess it was karma… I knew I shouldn't have convinced Lauren Mallory to bring her friend and have a threesome with me. She hadn't fucking wanted it. I should have never done it, as wonderful as it had been.

I was confused over the Bella situation. I had been sure we were made for one another. I was a pussy for thinking that way, but I've never felt this connection with a girl. Ever since I saw her at the food mart, I knew she was different; she was worth my time and effort. Bella was the girl I wanted to bring home and go to college with.

She was the one that could make Edward Cullen a monogamous motherfucker.

The bell rang. My new friends stood up from their seat and gathered their trays. Just as Emmett was hooking his arm around Rosalie's waist, I stopped him.

"Emmett, can I talk to you?" I asked him, he nodded and said goodbye to Rosalie.

"What's up man?" he asked knowingly, "Is it about Tanya and Isabella?"

The guy was good.

"Yeah," I said sheepishly.

"Well, what is it?"

"Are you sure they are…? You know…" I trailed off; I couldn't even say the word.

"Yeah, they are, believe me… there's been some PDA," reasoned Emmett. Fuck, I didn't want that fucking mental image, I had Biology next. Making up my mind I needed to explain, because I needed answers and I didn't think Bella would give them to me.

"Remember I told you that I fooled around with some girl at your house?" I asked him. He nodded.

"Well, it was Bella," and as I said this his jaw hit the floor.

"No fucking shit, I don't believe you!" he said after he composed himself.

"It's true," and I told him everything that happed, from the moment I met her, to the moment I found her at his bathroom. When I finished, he started laughing out loud. I frowned.

"Do you know what this means?"

I shrugged.

"She cheated on Tanya with you," he started laughing louder.

"Shhh, be quiet," I hissed because I didn't want anyone to hear this. Bella was mad at me as it was, I didn't want to upset her further.

"Man, you are my hero. Everybody's been trying to break them up, and you, oblivious to all this shit, made out with Swan, Tanya's going to cut your balls off."

"Well, she can do more than that, and Bella can be there too," I said that because I was an asshole and I didn't want to give away my feelings for Bella. I wasn't sure myself how I felt now that I knew the truth.

"I'm sure you could never be as hot as Denali," Emmett was being also an asshole.

"Yeah," I looked at Bella. Emmett saw this and rolled his eyes.

"Man, she has you by the balls, and she's never seen a pair," said Emmett.

Now it was my jaw's turn to hit the floor. The guy didn't even know me.

I thought I was being discreet about my fucking crush.

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**Warning:** Light femslash! Nothing too graphic, but yeah… Slash.

Hoped you liked it and please, if you do, review.


	2. The Pretenders

**Disclaimer:**All copyrighted, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.

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**Chapter 2: ****The Pretenders**

_**Edward Cullen**_

I was late for Biology, so when I entered the classroom, everybody was sitting in pairs at the lab tables. I went to meet the professor and he said that there was only one person left without a partner.

Isabella Swan… Bella…

_It figures._

No girl wanted to be near her.

No boy was allowed to be her partner.

Could I be any different? There was only one way to find out.

I hesitantly went to sit by her side. As I pulled the stool from underneath the table, she looked at me from the corner of her eye. I sat down and ignored her. I was mad at her. She lied to me, and... and now that I thought about it… _she used_ _me_.

I've been used. Used by Bella.

Fucking Karma…

So we didn't speak. I just listened to Mr. Banner's lecture. Well, not really listened, more like pretended I was listening because Bella was staring at me expectantly. Like she knew that I've heard about her not so little "secret". She was waiting for me to acknowledge her or something. I didn't though.

Half way through the period, I felt a piece of paper on top of my hand. I looked down and noticed something was written on it.

_I take it you already heard the truth about me._

_-B_

I looked at Bella, who was biting her lower lip, waiting for my answer. I took the pen from her hand and wrote down.

_Yeah, is it the truth though? Or are they just rumors?_

I had to know for sure that she was already taken. I needed to hear it from her. Well, in this case I had to read it from her handwriting that all that shit was true. I passed her the note along with the pen. As she read, her frown deepened and she bit her lip nervously. After Bella wrote something down, she passed me the note and the pen again. She looked ashamed and that was answer enough for me. But I read her note anyway.

_Yeah, I'm afraid it's true, unless you are talking about Tanya and me eloping to England, well that's bullshit._

I read it and I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry.

I chose neither.

I was too angry at her. I needed explanations, but I wasn't going to demand them because that would make me a hypocrite.

On one hand, I was feeling disappointed because what we had, had been a lie and it was the first time that I had a crush on someone, or an infatuation, or a fucking obsession this soon. Plus, she disregarded me when I defended her this morning. On the other, the asshole in me wanted to see what I could get out of this. Maybe even be her friend and fool around with both of them.

Fuck, this was harder than it seemed. The most reliable option was the latter, because that was more _ad hoc_ with my personality.

Plus, it would be a competition between that Newton boy and me. The difference would be that I was going to use my charm to get under their panties. This Mike had nothing on me. He seemed pathetic this morning pushing Bella. _That's not the way into a girl's pants asshole!_

Yes, that's what I was going to do. I was going to be the hypocrite, demand answers, forgive her and be her friend to get my threesome. I felt used and like a pussy, because I was whipped and we didn't even fuck.

Nobody fucked with Edward Cullen, not even this Bella. Plus, that comment that Emmett made... He saw right through me and it bothered me. As friendly as he seemed, maybe he would spread rumors about the new kid being whipped by the dyke Swan and I didn't like it. It was high school and I was Edward Cullen, so these things mattered. I had a reputation to build here.

Putting my plan in action, I grabbed the pen and wrote my answer.

_Why didn't you tell me the truth? I would never judge you. I may be an asshole,__but deep down I'm a good person_(I used her exact same words),_and…_

_Are you bi? Why did you made out with__me if you don't like dudes? I feel used and shit._

Bella grabbed the note from my hand and stared at it. I could see her eyes moistening as she read it. She took the pen with trembling hands and replayed back.

_Sorry, it was not my intention to make you feel that way, believe me. I was too drunk to think clearly. As for the truth, well I thought you would reject me as the rest of the school has done. Tanya and I don't exactly have friends and people are always avoiding us._

_And for the rest of your questions, I owe you an explanation. I think I'd rather tell you in person, so how about you come to my house or I go to yours after school and we can talk privately. I would prefer to go to your house since I don't want Tanya around. I haven't told her about Saturday night._

Interesting…

I liked the idea because I would be alone with her. But was bringing her to my house a good idea? I'd never brought girls home. Well I had, but not like this, not on a "be-friends-and-let's-talk-and-not-fool-around" environment. Plus, Bella was going to see my room since we didn't have a pool house anymore. I used to bring girls to the pool house back in L.A. so my parents wouldn't notice.

So, I never had a girl in my room, because it was my own personal "Fortress of Solitude"._But Superman took Lois there…_Fuck!

And there was this other factor to consider.

_Esme and Carlisle._

My parents were not oblivious to my sexcapades. In fact, my father was disappointed in me that I used girls for my own pleasure without committing to them. That's one of the reasons he brought me here. He said that in L.A. I was tempted by all the vices life had to offer. So I never introduced a girl to them. Bringing Bella home would be a big deal for my mom and I knew it.

Well, fuck it! My plan _needed_ to work so I had to put on the _whole_ façade.

But was I really fooling myself?

_**Bella Swan**_

As the bell rang signaling the end of the period, Edward took his unused notebook and left the classroom after fisting my hand around the folded note. I unrolled it and read his answer.

_I'll meet you after class__at the corner where there's a gas station. You can follow me home in your truck._

When I finished reading the note, I ripped it into millions of pieces and threw it in the trash can on my way out. I didn't need evidence of my correspondence with Edward, because I wasn't planning on telling Tanya about Saturday night. It hadn't meant anything and it would break her heart.

I sighed as the severity of my actions sunk into me. All the implications and the confusion that I had created. I screwed up _big _time. I hated the situation I was in.

Saturday night I had been so angry at Tanya because of her nose job that I recklessly went to Emmett McCarty's house to get drunk. I didn't know what I was thinking when I went. What was I expecting to happen? I knew the answer very well. I was expecting to see Edward Cullen again. That day I hadn't known his name so I called him the "market boy".

So, when I arrived at my destination, I looked around but he wasn't anywhere to be found. Deciding that coming had been a waste of time and without anybody noticing me I went upstairs. I knew the McCarty's house well because when we were kids, Alice, Tanya, and I, used to come here for his birthday parties.

I made my way to the second floor bathroom and lay in the tub, closing the curtains so nobody would notice me. Reluctantly, I took small sips from my bottle of flavored vodka, all the while thinking about Edward and Tanya. I wanted to be with either of them but for two completely different reasons.

At that moment I wanted either Tanya's love and protection or market boy's friendship and jokes. I drank desperately, scrunching my nose at the foul taste of the liquid.

But I knew that out of the two of them, I wanted her more.

I wanted Tanya with me because I regretted what I said to her on Friday and that day after her operation. I wanted to tell her that I was sorry and that I was going to support her in every decision she made in spite of my personal beliefs.

I knew she didn't need a fucking nose job but Irina, her sister, was always seeding strange ideas into Tanya's head. I hated Irina, she was so jealous of Tanya, always telling her that her nose was crooked, or that her hair was a mess or was constantly pointing out flaws that were not there. So naturally, when Irina heard about this Doctor Cullen coming to town, she insisted Tanya should get a nose job. She convinced her, of course, because Tanya always looked up to her.

She was older than Tanya, so it was normal behavior, but Irina was always taking advantage of that. In fact, the only problems between Tanya and I were caused by her "lovely" sister. Ever since we came clean about our relationship, Irina had been pushing us apart, always spreading bad things about me around town or setting up blind dates for Tanya with her male college friends. She couldn't accept the fact that we loved and needed each other, unlike her oldest sister, Kate and her husband Garrett. At first they were shocked, but then they accepted us with open arms.

_But Irina…_

Urgh!

And now more than ever, I hated her. She was being obnoxious and ridiculous because she was getting married. Everything was about her, "her wedding this, her wedding that". So things at Tanya's house weren't great. I knew she needed attention and support, because lately she had been depressed about her mother. In three days it was going to be the anniversary of her mother's death. It had been seven years since _the incident_, and I knew that these days were going to be very difficult for Tanya. They always were.

I had been such an asshole. I shouldn't have snapped at her about her damn nose job. But most importantly, I shouldn't have cheated on her with Edward…

_Oh, God! Then there was Edward._

Why was he a problem? I just met him. But, when I saw him at the food mart, I knew there was something about him…

Something that had pulled me towards him. I've never felt that way. I had this strong urge to come close to him and talk to him. Maybe talk about the weather, or about the latest football game, or about whatever he was into.

Somehow, I approached him, pretending I was going to pick some fruit or whatever it was that he was buying. I manned up and "accidentally" grabbed the same apple that he seemed to want. Interacting with the opposite sex was something that I didn't do.

_Ever._

Well, except with my dad, but he didn't really count. But, as I got to interact with Edward I felt at ease and even though the topic of conversation had been strange and brief, there was a spark in his eyes that radiated something. And that night, as I lay in bed I recognized why I was so taken by him.

_Friendship._

I wanted his friendship.

And this was my chance to have a real friend.

I _needed_ a friend.

Because even though Tanya was with me unconditionally, I was still missing something. I wanted someone who would listen to my worries, fears, and problems as an outsider.

But I was scared…

What if he found out what I was and would behave like every red-blooded teenager? Or worse, what if he decided he didn't want to become my friend because I was weird and defective? What if he was one of those homophobic people that I saw all over town?

But then… then, the bathtub make out session happened. How could I be so stupid? I had been drunk and angry at Tanya, then the feeling of guilt overpowering the anger, and I was confused as hell. And to strengthen my confusion, he walked into my bathroom, _my territory_, in all his wonderful drunken glory and then we started talking and getting closer physically and connecting emotionally and the opportunity presented itself and I had been curious and then…

_Curiosity killed the cat._

And yeah, I was dead. Because I _shouldn't_ have kissed him, because it felt so... so unlike kissing a woman. He was so masculine with his squared jaw and stubble, and then my hands trailed towards his hard abdomen, to the firm planes of his chest. And then the feel of his covered hardness in my hand. It had felt so different from what I was used to. I knew that I had been drunk, so my brain had deceived me, nothing I felt was real. It had been a momentary lapse of judgment, nothing more. And yeah, it felt different, so what?

Different good?

Different foreign?

I wouldn't know. But of one thing I was sure, what I did with Tanya behind closed doors, felt better because we explored and learned the ways of our bodies. So his amazing masculinity was created by a fragment of my imagination caused by vadka. It had not been real.

And then as I woke up on top of him, my mind somehow clearer than ever, I freaked out. I ran out of the house and into my truck and ten minutes later I was in my room, sobbing into my pillow. I cried all Sunday.

Tanya didn't call all day because she had been a bit mad at me. I stayed all day beside my cell and the house phone. As it rang, my heartbeat increased because of the nerves. But I was disappointed to hear that it wasn't Tanya, but Edward. The last person, who I wanted to talk to at the moment, was on the other side of the line.

I somehow knew that in spite of my bad judgment the previous night, I wanted to grasp on the opportunity to be friends. So I didn't cut him off abruptly or anything, I just wanted him to somehow understand that I couldn't deal with us right now. I had other important issues and he needed to know me before talking to me, because he was in for a surprise that I didn't dare spoil.

Edward would eventually find out and he would have the power to decide if he wanted to be my friend or not. It was going to be a decisive moment. It would serve to see if he was worth having as a friend or not. What if he was a pig, like Mike Newton or every other horny boy at school, who disrespected my relationship with Tanya by making stupid proposals?

And then today in the morning, I felt awful again. First, because it was heartbreakingly cute how Edward defended me against Mike. But I had to reassure myself and him that it was not his place to defend me. I could handle the asshole by myself and Edward shouldn't be my knight in shining armor because he might not be here to stay in the long run. I shouldn't get used to his presence.

The second thing that made me feel awful was when Tanya arrived at the scene with gauze covering her nose. It surprised me that Tanya and Edward knew each other, since I hadn't put two and two together. It was obvious that Dr. Cullen was Edward's father, as he was new in town as well. So the knowledge that my girlfriend and the guy I cheated on her with, knew each other made my wrongdoings so tangible that I could feel them in my back, as they grew heavier under me.

The three of us were standing there for a couple of seconds, surrounded by the gossipy crowd of Forks High. At that moment I had a vivid image of what Edward and I did at Emmett's party. My insides turned upside down, leaving a hole in the pit of my stomach. I felt dirty and so out of character, because that was so unlike me. I prided myself on being loyal, but after all, I didn't know myself that well.

Tanya had been so good to me and she didn't deserve this. She always protected me and was with me every step of the way. She was like the mother who abandoned me. She was the only friend who accepted me and she was my lover who guarded me from harm. Is that how I repaid her?

And then, there was this other issue. As Edward stepped into the Biology classroom I saw his face. I felt self-conscious because I was one hundred percent sure that the rumors had reached his ears. Suddenly, his opinion about me had an enormous effect on my emotions. He had a look of disdain on his face. I didn't know whether it was caused by my sexual orientation or by my big fat lie. So for the second time in his presence, I manned up and wrote the note that I just tore into pieces.

I went to my next class, _P.E._

I loathed that class because, as usual, all the girls ran away from me as soon as I put a foot inside the dressing room. They weren't even good looking. They thought so highly of themselves. Didn't they notice that I wasn't interested in any of them? I just rolled my eyes and proceeded to change into my gym clothes.

Another reason why I hated gym class was because I felt self-conscious about the required uniform. For the girls, it consisted on a pair of white shorts and a white polo shirt. As the class began and I started running and jumping, the boys would ogle my legs or chest and I hated that. I tried to ignore the stares but they made me uncomfortable. I pushed it into the back of my mind because I couldn't do anything about it.

When the class ended, I started feeling a bit nervous. I was going to be alone with Edward. What was I supposed to say to him? I did owe him an explanation.

I felt bad for what I did. I would never drink again. Not only did I mess up with a potentially new friend, but I also cheated on Tanya. I never knew I could be capable of such things.

When I arrived at the gas station, I saw a silver Volvo parked in front of the convenience store. It must have been Edward's car. I parked my truck next to his vehicle and rolled down my window. He hadn't noticed that I was there, because he was scrolling through his iPod. Getting outside of my truck, I knocked at his window. He abruptly looked at me and rolled it down.

"I was starting to think that you wouldn't come."

"Well, I'm here now, aren't I?" I said, rolling my eyes at him.

"With you I don't know what to expect... next thing I know you could be a Russian spy from the KGB," he joked and I couldn't help but smile. Maybe I shouldn't be nervous; after all he was being playful._And a dork._

"Don't be silly!" I smacked him lightly on the head. He frowned and rubbed the spot where I hit him. Again, I rolled my eyes, "Such a girl, Cullen."

"Wish I was," he said under his breath, chuckling, "Well, get inside your truck and follow me."

I ignited the engine, following his car onto the main road. He started to decrease his speed and turned onto an unpaved road into the woods. We kept on driving though the misty forest, the thick trees encasing us. The atmosphere of the forest was dark and mysterious. I felt as if I was driving towards an unknown forbidden destination.

Maybe I was.

After what seemed like several minutes, the trees started thinning and the path became clearer. Light was at the end of the road, welcoming brightness after the condemned darkness.

When we got out of the forest, I could see a solitary three-story house in the middle of a green and alluring clearing. The structure was white and beautiful, as beautiful and big as Tanya's. We parked in front of it and I got out of my truck.

I was too caught up staring at the house, that when Edward tapped my shoulder, I jerked, startled by the contact. He chuckled, giving me his crooked sexy grin and something unexpected happened. My heart stopped and my breath caught in my throat.

_What was that?_

How could a simple expression on a boy's face cause this reaction to my body? Not even Tanya's beautiful smile did this to me. Nervousness crept again through my body. I should have known that this meeting was not the best idea. Maybe trying to be his friend was not a good idea either. I was standing in front of trouble himself.

"What's wrong?" asked Edward, looking at my furrowed brow.

I snapped out of it and gave him a forced reassuring smile, "Nothing, I-I... just spaced out."

Edward looked at me oddly before ascending the few stairs that lead to the main entrance. I followed him to the porch. He opened the door and moved aside, letting me in first. As I stepped inside, I gasped.

The inside was even more beautiful, it was so full of light. The back side of the house was made of glass and the brightness of the green forest was reflected on the shiny mahogany floor. The furniture was all white, even the grand piano that was placed at the far corner of the living room. I couldn't help but notice that everything was so neat and flawless. Surely, Mrs. Cullen must be a neat freak to have everything in white and in good condition.

"Mom, I'm home!" yelled Edward from behind me, snapping me out of my reverie.

I heard footsteps and I noticed that a caramel brown haired woman with kind eyes was descending the stairs. As she noticed my presence, her lips curved into smile.

"Edward honey, who's your friend," asked who I assumed was Edward's mother.

"She's Bella, Bella this is my mom, Esme," Edward mumbled, a pink tint visible on his cheeks. Was he embarrassed?

"Bella, I'm so glad to meet you... I'm surprised," said Esme, shaking hands with me. "Edward has never brought a girl home."

What? That was _really_ unexpected. Didn't he say that he was popular among girls? Surely he must have had tons of girlfriends.

Edward cleared his throat and I turned to look at him. He scratched the back of his head and was staring at his shoes. Esme and I locked eyes and giggled.

Breaking the tension he was feeling, he spoke, "Let's go to my room."

We walked up the stairs. The hall at the second landing was also white and long. We passed door after door until he finally halted in front of a black one.

He opened it and I was met by an enormous room, where the back wall was also made of glass, just as the hall and living room downstairs. One of the conventional walls had a big shelf full of CDs, DVDs, and books. Next to that shelf was a plasma T.V. with its complete surround system. A black leather couch was facing the T.V. On the other side of the room was a queen sized bed. The floor was covered with a thick gold carpet. His room looked sophisticated and masculine. Something I was not used to.

Edward motioned for me to enter, closing the door and sitting on the couch. I followed, taking a seat next to him. He looked at the T.V. and I did the same, the black screen reflecting our awkwardness. I noticed that Edward was nervous. He was tapping his foot against the carpet and running his hand through his hair.

His hair...

It was so silky, so perfect.

_Stop it!_

Tanya's hair between my fingers felt good, too. I wished I could have hair like that...

I glanced at Edward once more and our eyes lock this time. After a moment or two, we both smiled and then, the next thing I knew, we were laughing hysterically. All of the tension lifting.

As seconds passed, the muscles from my stomach started to hurt, so I stopped, and breathed slowly. Edward stopped laughing too.

"That was awkward."

"Yeah," I agreed.

"So..." Edward shifted, adjusting his body so he could look at me.

"Yeah?"

"You are..." He trailed off, but I knew what he wanted to ask.

"Yeah," I said the same word for the third time, then added, "Sorry."

"What are you apologizing for?"

"For Saturday night, I guess," I mumbled, embarrassed by the memories.

"Do you regret it?" Edward asked, looking intently into my eyes.

_Do I regret it?_

"Yes," I sighed, "Sorry."

"Don't apologize anymore," he closed his eyes and threw his head back, exposing his thick neck. The neck that I kissed thoroughly in the bathtub at Emmett McCarty's house. I gulped.

"So, why did you kiss me?" he mumbled, rubbing his eyelids.

"Because I was drunk and it seemed like a good idea at the time... I wasn't thinking about the consequences, or your feelings, or about Tanya..." my voice broke at the end, the emotions of guilt coming back again just as tears moistened my eyes. I fought them back, not wanting to cry in front of a guy.

Edward opened his eyes and looked at me, noticing my change in mood. An involuntary tear slid down my cheek, causing him to frown in concern. "Please don't cry."

I nodded and dried my face with my hands. I forced a smile to reassure him that I was okay. He smiled back and again, my body reacted the same way it did outside of his house. I couldn't believe my reactions to him. My period was coming this week, so that must be it.

"So, Tanya, huh?" He asked playfully, trying to lighten the mood, "She's pretty hot."

I chuckled but didn't answer.

"So, it's none of my business, but... How did it start?" I knew that was coming.

"No, it's okay, I don't mind," I answered politely, "It's a long story."

He nodded, allowing me to continue.

"You see...when we were fifteen..."

_Tanya's__father was an alcoholic and depressed. He never seemed to be satisfied with his life although he was wealthy, had a wonderful family, and great health. He had the three things that most people yearned for in life. But that was not enough._

_He had always wanted a son. He only had three daughters and his wife couldn't have more children, and it had been his mission in life to procreate a son. He wanted him to follow in his footsteps and work in the family business. But his dreams were shattered._

_And he blamed his wife, because she wasn't able to give him that. He was ignorant, because he never knew, or wouldn't accept, that the sperm had the X or Y gene. To him, everything that went wrong in the world was because of women._

_Women were__just useful for one thing: to serve men._

_To serve them in all aspects. They had to prepare a hot meal for when he arrived, they had to clean his clothes, to have his children and educate them, and of course, they had to serve him in bed._

_So, he blamed Tanya's mother for everything wrong in his life. He never paid attention to his daughters because he didn't care about them. It was his wife's chore to care for them. He was doing enough by giving them a roof, the best clothes, and food that money could buy._

_Also, people in town knew that he went to Port Angeles for "business". The fact was that he was meeting with his mistresses. Tanya's mother was not oblivious to this, but she stayed with her husband for her daughters. Their father could pay for the best colleges, so they could have a bright future if she stayed with him._

_One night, when the old man was drowning his sorrows with alcohol, the four women arrived with handfuls of shopping bags. They were joyful and noisy, and this irritated Tanya's drunken father. When he drank, he had the tendency of becoming violent, but it had never gone too far._

_However, that night he began shouting at them, telling them that they were of no use, because the only thing they knew how to do was spend his money on bullshit. Tanya's mother got so angry that she told him that their daughters could buy whatever they wanted, because he always bought jewelry for his mistresses. It was only fair that their daughters would get their fair share of his fortune._

_He got so angry at her retort, that he grabbed a fistful of hair from Mrs. Denali's head and dragged her to his office. Tanya and her sisters tried to follow them to help their mother, but their father locked the door. They heard shouts, loud thumps, and moans of pain. He was clearly beating up their mother._

_They were scared and felt impotent. They wanted to help their mother. Kate called my father and, her then boyfriend, Garrett to come and calm down their father. But it was too late._

_As Charlie__arrived at the scene and opened the door, the lifeless body of Mrs, Denali was on the floor, beaten and bleeding. A drunken Mr. Denali was crying beside her, regretting his actions._

_My__father arrested him that night._

_His trial was held that same weekend in Seattle, where he pleaded guilty of charge for the murder of his wife under the influence of alcohol. He was sent to prison. Tanya hated her dad and had never gone to visit him. Not once._

_Tanya's and Irina's custodies were given to Kate, because she was a legal and responsible adult._

_Irina and Tanya were absent from school for months. They lost the school year, because instead they would go to therapy. Tanya wouldn't talk to anybody except her therapist and me. Those months were so hard for Tanya._

_Tanya, Alice Brandon, and I were the best of friends, but when this incident happened, Alice felt left out. And at that moment in her life Alice and I couldn't deny Tanya anything, so she complied. I still talked to her, but we grew apart as she started hanging out with the Hale twins._

_Tanya didn't want__to have anybody around, just us. We were ten or eleven, so we didn't play with dolls that much anymore. We would go to La Push beach to swim, or we would go to Port Angeles just to walk and hang out. Her sisters were grateful with me for spending my free time with her. I was okay with it, because I didn't have anything else to do, I always was all alone in my house since my father had to work and my mother left me when I was four._

_So the years passed in pretty much the same fashion. Her sister Kate married her boyfriend Garrett and he came to live at Tanya's house because her sister wouldn't leave them alone. By then, Tanya and I grew closer together. We did everything together. Sometimes she would stay at my house over the night, sometimes I would stay on hers._

_On the fifth anniversary of her mother's death, Tanya stayed at my house because she couldn't be at the place where Mrs. Denali died. We were hanging out in my room, lying on the bed, talking about anything and everything. Tanya turned to me and asked me, "Do you have a crush on someone?"_

_I shook my head no, "Do you?"_

_She hesitated before shaking her head. We stayed silent for a moment. Tanya grabbed my hand in hers and intertwined our fingers. After several minutes, she broke the silence._

"_I hate men."_

_I stayed__silent; I didn't know what to say. That I hated men too? But that was not the truth. I found the boys in my class annoying, because they were always pulling at my hair and hiding my things, especially Mike Newton and Jasper Hale. But I didn't hate them._

_However, I didn't have to say anything because she spoke, "Bella, would you stay with me forever?"_

_I looked at Tanya again and saw that she was crying. It broke my heart, because she was so good with everybody, she didn't deserve this much pain. I pulled her at my side and hugged her. She clung to me with all her strength, burying her face in my neck. I didn't mind the closeness because it made her feel better._

"_Answer me Bella," she spoke against my neck, "Would you be with me forever?"_

"_Yes," I said against her hair, my right hand running through it._

"_Really?" she tilted her head back to look at my face. Our eyes locked and I saw all the pain that was going through her body. She felt alone in this world and I was the only thing she had apart from her sisters._

"_Yes," I whispered, reassuring her. We never broke eye contact, because as I answered her, the emotions on her eyes changed. Somehow I could feel that I took a bit of her ache with my answer. I liked this new look on her eyes._

_Concentrated on my achievement, I didn't notice as she started leaning into me until her lips met mine. At first I was shocked, but as Tanya's lips started moving frantically against mine, all worried evaporated. Snapping out of it, I complied, gladly that I could provoke another reaction out of her besides coldness that she was showing lately. Her kiss became more desperate and aggressive, because she was taking away her agony, using me to forget about everything._

_The kiss progressed and before I knew it, we were heavily making out in my bed. After several minutes, we stopped. Our breaths were labored and our chests were heaving. Oxygen entered my bloodstream and it flowed into my brain, making me realize what I had done._

_I had my first kiss._

_I made out with someone for the first time._

_And it wasn't how I imagined, because it had been with Tanya, my best friend._

_With Tanya, the girl I used to play dolls with._

_With the one I bought my first bra with._

_With the one who showed me how to put my first tampon on._

_With the one who explained to me how babies were made._

_And she was not just any girl. She was Tanya Denali, who I just promised I would never stay away from her. But that wasn't a problem because one of my virtues was loyalty._

_I turned to look at her and caught her staring at me. She gave me a nervous smile and directed her gaze to the ceiling._

"_What are you thinking?" she asked. I contemplated her question for a moment before answering, "I was thinking about the kiss."_

"_What about it?"_

"_I don't know..." I trailed off; confusion could be heard in my voice._

"_Did you like it?" She asked, and again I hesitated before answering._

_Did I like it?_

"_I guess..." I answered her truthfully, "You?"_

"_I loved it," she said, looking at me once again, smiling. I loved to see her smile, because nowadays she rarely did it. We stayed silent again, both smiling and looking at one another. Tanya spoke again._

"_Bella, I like you," she confessed._

"_I like you, too."_

"_No, you don't understand... I like you, like you..." My eyes widened in understanding._

"_What?"_

_Tanya frowned at my reaction and turned away from me, giving me her back, "Never mind."_

"_No, Tanya... Sorry, I... I didn't mean it that way... it's just... that was unexpected."_

"_No, I guess I shouldn't have said it..." she said sadly._

_Silence followed yet again. I was so stupid, of course I liked it. It had felt so good, different. I definitely wanted to try again. Plus, I loved Tanya. We've been through a lot together. She was everything I had besides Charlie. It was only logical that we'd stay together because we were meant to be. It was unconventional, but we could figure that out later. We were not the first ones to be like this..._

_Girl and girl together._

_Making up my mind, I spoke. "Tanya, look at me... I freaked out a little, but you know... I like you, like you, too."_

_She faced me again, but this time with a shocked smile on her lips. "Bella, are you sure?"_

_I nodded, a smile visible in my face, because__I was one hundred percent sure. She quickly hugged me, pressing me against her body and crashing her lips against mine._

_Later that night, we decided that we would take things slow. That when we felt comfortable with the relationship, we would tell our families because this was for real and for eternity. We needed patience and courage to confront the society._

_That week, we drove to Port Angeles and bought several books that would help us. We also entered some websites with information about homosexuality and sexual preferences._

_And yes, I was afraid, very much afraid. But as long as Tanya was at my side I felt protected and happy..._

"And that's how it happened... Tanya suffered a lot... I guess that discovering that we loved each other, like, ummm… you know… was what motivated her to live happily again." I explained to Edward. He seemed apprehensive by the Denali family's sad story.

"And have you ever told your father?" he asked curiously.

"Last year," I answered, more at ease now that he knew why things were this way. "He took it badly. Charlie was shocked; he couldn't believe that I preferred girls, and that my childhood friend was my, well… _girlfriend._ But a couple of months later, he started accepting me and respecting me. My mother was a completely different story though."

"Your mother?" Edward asked, confusion written in his face, "I thought she left."

"She did, but once in a while she would call to see if we were still alive, so naturally when I told her, she stopped calling," I shifted in my seat and stretched my legs before continuing, "It didn't hurt so much, she rejected me once so the second time didn't stir anything within me."

"And Tanya's sisters?"

"Urrrggghhh!" I groaned, "Kate is cool with it, but Irina..."

"Oh, I know Irina," said Edward smirking, "She is getting a liposuction next week."

"Is she?"

"Yep."

"I hate that bitch," I said with venom in my voice, "Tell your dad that he better screw up in her operation."

"I will," chuckled Edward, seemingly eager and curious about this whole affair. Honestly, I felt relieved, liberated, and so happy that I was finally getting this out of my chest.

"So people at school? How did they find out?"

"Well, we didn't tell them exactly, Tanya and I don't display our affection publicly, but you know how people are. They started spreading rumors. So every day, they pointed and stared at us. We got tired of all that bullshit, so one day we decided that one display of affection would be appropriate, just to shut up their mouths, so she kissed me at lunch."

"I wish I could have seen that," Edward murmured to himself, but I heard him. I leaned into his body and smacked him in the head for the second time that day. He scrunched his nose and narrowed his deep green eyes. I smiled innocently. He looked cute like that.

"That's what happens when you say those things..."

"Well, it's your fault, you are giving me those mental images, you know how guys love to see girl on girl action... I wouldn't be a male if I didn't; especially two hot ones like you and Tanya." He said, smirking mischievously.

Now it was my turn to narrow my eyes. How dare he? I should have known he was like the rest of them. But, I still wanted him around. Those kinds of comments didn't bother me as much coming from his mouth. Why was that?

I was in desperate need of a friend.

Dismissing his comment and rolling my eyes at him, I stood up abruptly and went to stand in front of the big shelf. I scanned through his CD/DVD collection and found that we had similar tastes in both. Something that I'd always hated about Tanya as she had different tastes in music and movies than I did.

I turned to look at Edward, incredulity written on my face, as I caught him staring at my behind. _What a pig?_ But then again, this attention coming from him didn't bother me, and if I admitted it to myself, I even welcomed it. My stomach turned just by thinking about my acknowledgement of these feelings, my acceptance of loving to feel like a normal girl. Because something about him, made me feel..._desired?_

Standing in front of his bookshelf, immersed in my thoughts, my eyes focused at a random place when Edward startled me. He came running to my side, cheeks flushed.

"I haven't read those books," He said quickly, his eyes wide in shock. I looked at the books he was trying to cover with his arm, and saw... _Harry Potter? Seriously?_

I broke into laughter as I saw his reaction to hiding his books. _So high and mighty Edward Cullen__read Potter, huh?_ For a second there, I thought he wanted to hide playboy magazines or something along those lines. But he was so different from what he showed the world, because even though he said he hadn't read those, I knew better. This was one of his little secrets. Secrets that embarrassed him as if they were sins.

Laughing hard, I pushed his arm away and grabbed a _tattered_ copy of "Goblet of Fire". I inspected it, smirking knowingly at him, as he just tried to look away. I couldn't resist how cute he looked when he was embarrassed so I decided to tease him, as he did with his hormonal comments.

"I love this book, mine isn't this battered though," I pointed out the torn green jacket.

"My friend Seth read it a couple of times," mumbled Edward, reaching for the book and putting it between "Prisoner" and "Order".

"Well, such a shame, because it's such a good book, especially the part where Harry invites Ginny to the Yule Ball."

"He does? Doesn't he invite Parvati?" he asked, confusion written on his face. I just giggled as understanding crossed his features, gradually narrowing his eyes at me, "Oh! You didn't!"

However, I didn't have time to move, as Edward launched into me, tickling my ribs and sides, pinning me to the bookshelf. I started laughing as soon as he touched me, writhing and twisting awkwardly, trying to get away from his grip. My arm muscles felt tired and my abs hurt from laughing so hard, almost preventing me to from noticing his wonderful scent._Almost._

I was drunkenly laughing as I started pushing against him, squealing, "Stop, stop it, please!"

"Never! You owe me; you know my biggest secret, now I'll have to kill you!" he said, smirking, his cheeks still flushed from the embarrassment and his hair messier than a few minutes ago. Squirming and rubbing against him, so lost in our little game and stupidly funny demeanor, I didn't notice when the door opened. A huge gasp could be heard, followed by a, "Sorry, I didn't mean to!"

Edward's hands froze on the spot, my eyes widening as I heard Mrs. Cullen closing the door. Edward snorted, chewing on the inside of his cheeks, as he ran out the alcove, yelling to his mother the famous and cliché phrase, "it's not what it looks like".

I felt awful that it was the third time that I'd seen this guy and I already was behaving like this. It was like if we were two magnets, attracted and inseparable. I tried to not behave this way with him, but it was inevitable. Would I be able to be his friend if this kept happening? Would Tanya approve of my friendship with Edward? This was all so foreign to me.

The amity, the familiarity, the comfort, the attraction.

_Male attraction._

Inhaling, I fell to my knees, gripping my hair tightly. I really did want Edward as my friend. Everything he did, said, or thought, didn't bother me as much as when other boys acted that way. Before I started to ponder deeper into the subject, said guy entered the room, giving me a sheepish smile. Subconsciously, it put me at ease just a little bit.

"She was freaked out, but whatever," he shrugged, like it wasn't a big deal that his mom thought that I was an easy girl, "She says dinner is ready."

I nodded, wanting for a second to get out of this house. Was he fucking kidding me? Did he expect me to sit and eat dinner with his mom there? He must have seen my confused expression because he asked, "What? Are you okay Bella?"

Making up my mind, I spoke, "Actually Edward, I think I'll head home, my dad will be worried."

"Bullshit," he stretched his hand, reaching for mine. The frown in his forehead told me that he wasn't as comfortable and suave as the façade he was showing let on. However, trusting in him, I took his hand as he pulled me up. His frown disappeared and he squeezed my hand reassuringly.

"If you don't get that pretty ass downstairs and sit with my mom, she'll feel awful; she was more embarrassed by that than we were, believe me." He reasoned warmly, making me feel as if he _really_ wanted me to stay with him throughout the evening. If I wanted to make this friends thing work, I knew what I had to do.

"Okay," I sighed, following him out to the hallway.

Once in the dining room, I saw Mrs. Cullen with a glass of Chardonnay in her hand. But she was not alone, as I saw who I supposed was Mr. Cullen. I gasped as I saw how perfect he seemed. He was a very handsome and groomed man, like if he was an actor of a Hollywood movie. _Dr. Cullen was a surgeon stupid, of course he had to look perfect._

"Bella?" Edward said, bringing me back to reality. I shook my head and blushed, feeling the eyes of all the Cullen members on me. I tried to smile politely, extending my hand, but was taken aback when Dr. Cullen nodded coldly at me. He turned to Edward and said, "Son, can I talk to you in private?"

Mrs. Cullen just looked at her husband oddly and Edward gave me an apologetic smile, following his father out of the room and into the hallway.

Esme and I stood awkwardly for several minutes before she spoke, "Do you like pork chops with steam veggies, honey?"

I was about to answer when I heard Dr. Cullen raising his voice.

"What the fuck do you want Edward? A Lamborghini? I'll give you the fucking car, just don't brin—" he was cut off as Edward overlapped his voice.

"WHAT THE FUCK, DAD?" I was starting to feel nervous. What was this about?

"She's the police chief's daughter, and this lovely girl… _Irina Denali_said that the Swan girl is bad news Edward, that's the reason we moved here in the first place!" I gasped, a small tear sliding down my cheek. I was startled when I felt Esme's hand on my shoulder as her glass felt to the floor. Her widened eyes were looking in the direction of the hallway.

Edward snorted sarcastically, speaking with a mirthful tone, "And you actually take her word? This is a fucking stupid town."

"No Edward, here's where your Granddad was raised, and that girl was very charming, but this Swan, she… she's a…"

"_A what, dad?"_ Edward asked; the same mordant tone coloring his pitch.

"Never mind, tomorrow I'll take you to Seattle so you can see the cars."

"No, I don't need a fucking car. You don't get it, do you?"

"No Edward… I don't know what goes through your head, I try to, I really do, but no son, I can't understand, I—"

"No dad, you would never understand. I hate that you are superficial, that you pretend to be perfect, with the perfect house, and the perfect car, and the perfect profession, and the perfect appearance, and the perfect clothes, and the doped Stepford wife, but somehow, it doesn't seem to be enough! I am never enough for you and I am tired, I am tired of this bullshit because, yes I like luxury, but one starts to hate them when they realize that they are useless, they are not my dad!"

At that moment, I understood him. He put up that façade just so he could be perfect and popular. Perfect so he could get his father's attention. Popular so he could be the king of the school, the rebel cool guy. That thought saddened me, but also angered me. Dr. Cullen was not a very nice man, and his words had hurt. I needed to get out, but my feet were stuck.

"You don't talk to me like that Edward!" Dr. Cullen sounded furious, "You are a selfish little brat, and are doing this to piss me off, aren't you?"

Edward just snorted, he sounded so much more calmed, as if he was breathing deeply. He must have realized that I could hear them.

"You don't know how hard I'd busted my ass to get you here, to give you the best education, the best things, and you, you pay me back like this? She's no good, Irina Denali said that Isabella corrupted her little sister, that she's a… _a lesbian."_

I was incredulous and hurt. How could Irina's hatred and Dr. Cullen's stupidity make me feel this way?

"DON'T YOU FUCKING TALK ABOUT HER LIKE THAT, _EVER!"_Edward shouted in my defense and deep down, that thought made me happy, but the other feelings and emotions were overlapping this sentiment. "Bella is the most fucking amazing girl I've ever talked to, she's natural, humble, shy, and friendly. She does not deserve this Carlisle!"

"I am your father, and you should have more respect for me," He was now breathing shallowly, "And I don't care, I just don't want you to be seen with her."

This was enough, Dr. Cullen had stroked a cord and it hurt. I needed to get out, I was suffocating, I was humiliated and fucking marred. Mrs. Cullen was in shock but responded when she saw my attempts to move my paralyzed legs. She smiled apologetically and squeezed my shoulder, "Bella honey, I, I am really sorry you had to see this, I…"

Gulping and getting it together so my voice wouldn't crack, I said, "It's okay Mrs. C, I need to get going, my dad needs me home."

She nodded and apologized again. At that instant, the door banged and Edward came in, his father following behind him.

"Bella, I am sorry!" he said exasperated. Edward's expression contorted with rage, but as he saw me, his facial muscles relaxed a little.

"Edward I need to go, my da—"

"No Bella, no. Don't go!" He reached for my arm, stopping me. I put my hand on top of his and pulled him away, giving him a forced smile that caused a tear to pour down my cheek.

"It's okay, I really need to."

Resigning, he just nodded and accompanied me to the door. As we got there, he opened it for me and we both stood in the doorway. I looked at his face, our eyes locking when I spoke, "Goodbye Edward."

"No, Bella, don't be mad at me, I, he… urgh… he's just so uptight and fucking close-minded," he struggled, convincing me that he wasn't to blame. I chuckled lightly, my eyes swollen from the few ushered tears.

"Don't worry, see you later." I was exasperated, ready to get out of there. He was making it difficult and after that scene with Dr. Carlisle, I was getting unsure of my friendship with his son. As I was turning around, he stopped me, searching my eyes.

"Can I still call you?"

I was silent for a moment, another tear sliding down my cheek. Was he serious? Was he ignoring his father's orders? Was I worth that much as a friend to him? Was he defying him just as Tanya and I would the kids from school?

But the fucking doctor was his father, whereas the stupid teenagers meant nothing to us.

Sighing, I met his intense gaze and nodded. His lip twitched, trying to form a smile, but couldn't. In that moment I felt the impulse to reach for him and hug him. I did. Briefly.

That reassured him that I was fine with him. That reassured me that I might make this work. I acknowledged the fact that somehow, in this few days, I had become important to him.

Pulling away from him and his soothing aroma, I waved my hand and turned around. He did the same, his expression blank. I felt bad for Esme and him—_the pretenders._

As I pulled my car away from the Cullen's perfect mansion, I knew the direction I needed to take. I needed her badly.

_I needed Tanya._

_

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Big thanks to my beta **magan bagan**, for making this chapter readable. Big thanks to **naelany **and **ForksReverie** for being there whenever I needed an opinion.


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